sometimes, when i don’t know what to draw, it just comes out like a bunch of ghosts. and a television.
I love this.
I like being alone; away from my friends on the holidays. Is that weird? That makes me sound unhappy and anti social but I’m not. I don’t strive for it, I just don’t mind it.
Who am I kidding, lately I’ve looked forward to it alot.
![Carmen: It’s okay to miss her, Bee. I mean, as hard as it is to be sad about it don’t you think maybe it’s harder not to be? Bridget: [Crying] You don’t understand. Tibby: [long pause] Bridge… Bridget: I can’t. It hurts too much. Carmen: I know. Bridget: No, you don’t know. I just want to feel good and happy and alive. Because if I feel alive then it doesn’t seem like she’s dead. And if I’m not sad then it proves that I’m not like her. Carmen: Bee, you don’t have to prove that to anybody. I mean, you have a strength in you that your mom never had. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t find it.](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l92wlzfnbC1qzlqbho1_500.jpg)
Carmen: It’s okay to miss her, Bee. I mean, as hard as it is to be sad about it don’t you think maybe it’s harder not to be?
Bridget: [Crying] You don’t understand.
Tibby: [long pause] Bridge…
Bridget: I can’t. It hurts too much.
Carmen: I know.
Bridget: No, you don’t know. I just want to feel good and happy and alive. Because if I feel alive then it doesn’t seem like she’s dead. And if I’m not sad then it proves that I’m not like her.
Carmen: Bee, you don’t have to prove that to anybody. I mean, you have a strength in you that your mom never had. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t find it.
I told youuuuuuuuuuu
But you didn’t even flinch, you don’t even care. What if it was true?
Well thanks a fucking lot.
It’s amazing how at one point in our lives we will be extremely close with someone and then later they will become a complete stranger. You will pass by them without a word. Without a single acknowledging look. This person, who once knew you so well, who once knew your fears, your desires, your dreams, your past, is now walking right past you, seeing right through you.
Several points in my life actually. It’s like an annual thing. Get close to someone, lose them, get close to someone else the next year, lose them too. Get close to the person you lost before, lose them again. That sorta thing.
And if we never speak again for the rest of our lives, that will be fine by me.
“
| — | I can’t decide yet. |
brother bear
I think mum could see me being a Spice Girl in my backyard. I got very scared and worried when she asked me what I was doing outside because she was sitting near the window so I ran to my room and played my Olivia Newton John record really, really loud. I wish everyday was Friday mornings, I know we could both use one (x100) during this painful week.
5012.) I stopped caring about everything because I wanted to stop getting hurt. It’s gotten me nowhere and only ruined every relationship since, but I don’t know how to start caring again.
